What happens when you put 340 undergraduates in a block of flats? Chaos! It was a regular occurrence for the fire alarm to go off at least once a week usually caused by some monkey on the fourth floor making (or should I say burning) toast at 6.00AM! Why 6.00AM? Who makes toast at 6.00AM? Well the alarm would go, you’d have to remove yourself from the ceiling and trudge across to Chester Rd Library in ya smalls where we’d all be lectured on the seriousness of setting off the alarm. The Geordie housekeeper old woman would repeatedly tell us “ av’ got yis allll in me book leek”! Eh? What, a hit list? Then, after Bijan (with Z3 & sexy helper Julie) had his say, the housekeeper would go on to tell us that “all the fear enginz in the north east have to come out leek” ……..we’re like ‘look! It’s 6.20AM……..i wanna sleep now dick head!’

One of the best comedy moments happened when the alarm went off one morning, I got up, trousers on, opened my door to see Big Gay Ben stood outside his room (lived opposite) trying to put the key in his door with a towel around him. ‘Ummm’ thought John ‘why has he just had a shower at 5.40AM? Anyway, seconds later, Johnnies door opens, as Ben’s towel falls off! You should have seen the confused look on Johnnies face as he closes the door, then reopens it to make sure he’s not having a nightmare!!