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CORAL SPRINGS, Fla. - 21-year-old Carl Lee Reese's luck went from bad to worse when he carjacked a Lexus belonging to Paul Brite, 53. Brite was confronted by the gunman at a carwash and forced to climb into his own trunk. Reese drove off, but pulled to the side of the road a short while later fearing Brite had a cellular phone with him. When he opened the trunk the victim came out brandishing two handguns that he had stored there earlier. The kidnapper refused to comply with several commands to lie on the ground, even after a warning shot. Brite was finally forced to shoot his attacker in the abdomen when Reese reached for his pocket. Police said they do not plan to charge Brite.



article of incorporation for pennsylvania



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--- Actor Richard Harris Won't Be Taking Viaagra Again... ---
Actor Richard Harris, 71, recently tried the anti-impotence drug Viagra only to discover it works a little too well. He tried the drug and after entertaining a lady friend, he attempted to take her out to dinner. As he put it, "I wouldn't use Viagra again. Your heart has to be good to take it. It worked too well. I was taking this woman out to dinner after- wards and I couldn't zip up my trousers." Now there's a prob- lem to have. Harris will next appear in the upcoming movie "Harry Potter and The Sorcerer's Stone" as Headmaster Albus Dumbledore.

-------------------- Dance Music Kills ---------------------- CAMBRIDGE, England - Researchers at Cambridge University have been attacked by animal rights groups for cruel and unusual music. The study examines how loud dance music increases the effects of speed, specifically methamphetamine. In the study, scientists drugged 238 mice and them forced them to endure fatal doses of loud dance music. Wendy Higgins of the British Union for the Abolition of Vivisection said, "These sick experiments are absolutely despicable. Just because people choose to take drugs and go to raves doesn't justify subjecting animals to suffering and death in a laboratory." The overall conclusion was that the loud music strengthened the effects of the methamphetamine in animals.

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article of incorporation for pennsylvania



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---- Californian Inventor Hopes Women Make AA Big Switch ----

CALIFORNIA - Women will be shocked when this little invention hits the market. Michael Pottenger from Santa Monica has in- vented an electronic bra that will stop sportswomen's breasts bouncing and keep them warm. According to Pottenger, piezo- electric strips are woven into the cups. When the switch is activated electricity goes to a resistor which stiffens the bra's cups, which in turn steadies the movement of the breasts and warms them up. The switch is said to also power separate piezo strips to more actively counteract breast movement.

-- Prankster's Brownies Incapacitates Firefiighters on Duty -

INDIANA - There will be no funny business around here. As a joke, Susanne Cole thought it would humorous to give hash- laced brownies to a group of 11 Elkhart firefighters last December. The dessert incapacitated all of the rescuers while on duty, even though they still responded to an emergency call. Judge Terry Shewmaker didn't see the humor in the situation and sentenced the prankster to four years in prison despite her weeping plea for leniency. She was officially charged with two felony counts of battery on firefighters and two misdemeanor counts of criminal recklessness. Fire Chief Jerry Vaughn testified that a paramedic went on call under the influence. "It could have been critical to a patient," he said.

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Opera Star sings: "I feel WOW! Send me another case! "

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